Just to put an exclamation point on concerns of witness validity, reliability and/or even stability. Ms. Piaget Crenshaw, the witness who claims she saw Officer Darren Wilson murder Mike Brown, is now claiming she witnessed the Ferguson Police Department burn down a Mike Brown memorial constructed of “candles and plush bears”.
It couldn’t be the candles and the Teddy bears came into contact. No, that wouldn’t be nefarious enough for the Ferguson crew.
Just like the shooting that spurred the actual memorial itself, Ms. Crenshaw had to quickly ramp up the drama and proclaim it was intentionally set by the Ferguson Police Department. A statement so ridiculous it would be funny were it not taken seriously by the professional agitators who need such provocations.
Now there are hundreds of angry Ferguson residents demanding justice for the victimized plush bears. The plush were also rumored to have been fearfully holding their hands up just prior to the arsonist’s flamethrower targeted at their stuffing.
Immediately the Washington Post dispatches a reporter to the scene and calls have been made to the U.S. Attorney General to open an investigation.
Early reports indicate the Missouri State Senate is being called into emergency session, and the Missouri Governor is rumored to be in closed door discussions about declaring another state of emergency until the assassins of the bear clan can be identified.
Private Citizen CSI crews are rapidly at work investigating the cause. President Obama has been notified and is prepared to take immediate and decisive action. Bears matter.
Antonio French is reported to be organizing a bear registration drive for this weekend. Several University students have volunteered to canvas the 100 Acre Wood and educate the plush citizens on their rights. Barbie is said to be coordinating a supportive March as the community moves forward with the healing process.
*Note* Parts of this are satire, parts are real. The fact you can barely tell the difference is the reality within Ferguson Missouri today.